Yesterday Is Gone: Let Old Mistakes Rest In Peace (Part Two)

(This is the continuation of the "Yesterday Is Gone" post that I made the other day. I apologize for the delay in publishing it.)

Following are a few tips I hope will help you if you've struggled with guilt like I once did. They occurred to me one day as I sat down and tried to figure out if there was something I could do in order to be able to kick out the guilt that had taken up residence in my life.

First, I focused on previous prayers of confession and asked myself, "Were they really sincere?" In case they weren't, I talked honestly with God about my regret over straying out of His will. Psalm 32:3-5 (NIV) says this about confession: When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the LORD"--and you forgave the guilt of my sin.

Next, I worked at convincing myself that, once I'd confessed and repented of (or turned away from) specific sins, God had forgiven them. I John 1:9 (NIV) helped in this area by revealing, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."

Finally, I had to learn to forgive myself when I messed up. This was a challenge for me since I'd often find it easier to forgive others than forgive myself. But, if my Heavenly Father--who hates sin--could forgive me, I should be able to forgive myself.

Although this wasn't usually the case for me, for some people, the guilt they're feeling may stem from the fact that they hurt someone and never apologized. A visit, phone call, letter or e-mail to the person who was offended might make a difference. On the other hand, apologizing as soon as the hurt occurs is an even shorter road to forgiveness and healing. An incident between a young woman I know--I'll call her Gigi, for the sake of her privacy--and her mother demonstrates the effectiveness of this approach.

While on a weekend road trip with her husband, their son and daughter, and her parents, Gigi misplaced her purse. When they began looking for it, the woman's mother began to berate the young woman about her tendency to lose things. Gigi took offense and vented her frustration by hollering at her mom. When Gigi realized what she'd done, she apologized for her rude response, even though she had been provoked. Expressing regret over her words soon after they'd flown out of her mouth--rather than after they'd returned home (or some time later)--honored her mother and kept the long car ride home from turning into an uncomfortable one.

Other times, sharing a burdensome secret about ourselves with an understanding and trusted fellow believer who'll pray with us about it can help. James 5:16 (NIV) says: "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." I find special comfort in talking with my husband, my sister, and my mom when I'm bothered by something I've done. Others may opt to talk with a best friend, a prayer partner or a minister at their church. Just remember to seek God's direction before choosing a confidant and pouring out your heart to them. You'll want the Holy Spirit to go before you to pave the way for a conversation characterized by love, compassion and emotional healing, not one filled with tension or embarrassment.

Closing Thoughts:

However God leads you to deal with past mistakes, please remind yourself that yesterday is gone. We can't keep beating ourselves up about things we did 10 years ago, one year ago, last month or 24 hours ago. God loves us; we are special to Him. He alone can help us break any chains of guilt that could keep us shackled to the past. If we keep reviving disturbing memories about the past, they'll weigh us down and keep us from experiencing the abundant, joy-filled life that comes from knowing a loving--and forgiving--God.

Scripture of Encouragement:

"I will cleanse them from all the sin they have committed against me and will forgive all their sins of rebellion against me. (Jeremiah 33:8, NIV)